Bud Bundy Tribute Or: A Questionnaire Answered in Rhyme

Well… this got a little out of hand. 😂

Darren’s questions about what we’d like to share for tonight’s Bud Bundy Tribute got me thinking about Bud, the Bundys, the Club… and what might have happened to all of them over the years.

Somehow, my answers turned into a “questionnaire answered in rhyme.” And somehow, that turned into seven minutes. 😂

So here it is: my little Bud Bundy Tribute.

Hope you enjoy it! 😊

Bud Bundy Tribute
Or: A Questionnaire Answered in Rhyme

So why the Bundys?
Well, let me explain,
I found them as a teenager
and somehow they remained.

While all my friends watched
The Bold and the Beautiful on TV,
I chose a shoe salesman
and his crazy family.

They were loud, sarcastic, brutally direct,
a little exaggerated
but more real than you’d expect.

Because underneath the insults,
the madness and the fun,
they felt like a real family
maybe that’s why they’ve had such a run.

My favorite was Al
funny, grumpy, always mad,
I always thought he deserved more
and somehow that felt sad.

But Al, not tonight
this isn’t about you,
‘cause Bud is our star,
and he’s long overdue.

So let’s talk about Bud:

He was smart, quick and full of pride,
creative, straightforward, confident
with nothing much to hide.

He never gave up trying,
whatever life would bring,
and as Grandmaster B,
he clearly thought that he could sing.

His ego was enormous,
his confidence was high,
he always had a master plan
to charm another girl nearby.

But when a woman
actually wanted him for real,
our little Casanova
suddenly forgot how he should feel.

From plastic Isis
to Crystal, Jamie, Dee Anna on the way,
then Amber, Ashley, Esmeralda
Bud would never stay away.

And Ariel proved
what we’d already come to see:

Bud’s biggest problem wasn’t women
it was when they agreed.

His greatest moments?

When he got Amber
and that bar fight with his dad.

His most embarrassing ones?
Well… too many.
Enough said.

So what became of Bud,
if the show had carried on?

He finished college
but his greatest plan had just begun:

Down in the Bundy basement,
he worked both day and night:

custom-made female robots
every man’s Miss Right.

No begging for affection,
no pleading for some fun,
just choose your perfect woman
and press a button: done.

But back then, tech was limited
and Bud was short on cash,
so he put his dream on hold
this future came too fast.

He worked as a model agent,
just trying to survive,
then the internet took over
and killed his nine-to-five.

He spent more time with NO MA’AM,
his great idea on ice,
until AI came along
and brought his dream back to life.

But dreams need money,
so Grandmaster B came back,
one final shot, one brand-new song
and boom! A number-one track.

With money in his pocket,
Bud’s robot dream took flight,
he built himself an empire
and his custom-made Miss Right.

No children in his future
that choice was quickly made.

He’d seen what kids did to his dad.
Enough.
The price was paid.

And what about the Bundys?

They’re still all around:

Al’s retired, much more peaceful
coaching football in his town.

Peg and Kelly run a beauty business online,
giving modern women tips
on looking simply fine.

Kelly’s married, raising twins
well, raising might be strong,
she drops them off with Al or Bud
whenever she is gone.

They’ve built an extra wing
the Bundys still stay near,
while Bud expanded underground
and made his own home there.

And if Bud had his own TV show?

Couples, come on in!

He’d test their love in wicked ways
determined not to let them win.

If they stay together, they win
and Bud admits defeat.

But if they break up, Bud takes all.

Now THAT’S his kind of treat.

So why, after all these years,
do Bundys still feel right?

One episode can take me back
a teenager for the night.

The world has changed,
but somehow their old chaos still rings true:

families fight,
they laugh,
they love
and drive each other crazy too.

And then the Bundy Club appeared
who knew where this would lead?

The distance suddenly felt smaller
something I could hardly believe.

We share our stories, memories,
hear things straight from those who know,
and somehow people miles apart
can still feel very close.

David, Darren, all the members
respectful, warm and real,
no walls, no distant pedestal
and that’s what makes it feel
less like a fan club
somewhere on the internet to me,
and more like one big Bundy family.

What could be better?

I guess that time will tell,
new ideas are always welcome
and that already works quite well.

But a Bundy Club app?
Absolutely.
Put that on the list.
And one big real-life meeting?
That’s the one thing not to miss.

So here we are,
almost thirty years since I first joined the ride,
from watching all alone back then
to having you guys by my side.

The Bundys taught us one thing
through every fight and fall:

you don’t have to be perfect
to be family at all.

And Bud, tonight is yours
so here’s to Grandmaster B:

I always thought I was more into Al…
but I think something changed in me.