Season 10 Episode 12: Love Conquers Al

Marcy and Jefferson come back from two days at Dr. Richelieu’s love compound and water park in a state Al finds alarming: Marcy is radiant, and Jefferson has been emptied out. He answers questions in a flat monotone, declares that love is all he needs, and informs Al that the Three Stooges are not funny. Al diagnoses the problem immediately, reaches under the couch cushion, and administers a Big ‘Uns centrefold, which produces a convulsion and then a full recovery. The scene is one of the series’ best two-man bits and it sets up the episode’s actual plot, because the retreat is where Al and Peggy are headed next.

The mission is to get Peg’s parents back together so that her mother leaves the Bundy house. Al, Peggy, Ephraim and the unseen Mrs. Wanker all go to the compound, where a therapist leads couples through feeding exercises and two rounds of “Kumbaya,” and Al endures the whole programme on the strength of what he stands to gain. It does not work out. Ephraim meets another man’s wife and departs on a world tour with her, which leaves the problem upstairs exactly where it was and gives Tim Conway his most consequential exit on the show.

The children’s half of the episode runs on a symmetry the writers clearly enjoyed. Kelly is seeing Carlos, who will not sleep with her, while Bud is seeing Carlos’s cousin Esmerelda, who is extremely willing, each sibling landing precisely the partner the other one would have wanted. Carlos is introduced here and comes back later in the season, making him one of only three boyfriends the series gave Kelly more than once.

Episode Facts

• Original air date: Sunday, December 10, 1995 on FOX
• Season 10, Episode 12
• Overall episode 224 of the series
• Taped December 1, 1995; production code 10.13
• Written by Paul Corrighn and Brad Walsh
• Directed by Amanda Bearse
• The title plays on the Latin omnia vincit amor, love conquers all
• First appearance of Kelly’s boyfriend Carlos

Guest Cast

• Tim Conway as Ephraim Wanker
• Mark D. Espinoza as Carlos
• Edward Hibbert as Dr. Richelieu
• Christina Solis as Esmerelda
• Lisa Boyle as Fawn
• Tiffany Granath as Pancake
• David Sederholm as Phillip
• Glori Gold as Naomi
• Kevin Bickford as the Clown

Deprogramming Jefferson

The opening scene is the episode’s reason to exist. Ted McGinley plays the brainwashed Jefferson completely straight, stiff, pleasant, answering in declarative sentences, and Ed O’Neill’s Al treats it as a medical emergency with a known cure. The diagnostic question is which Stooge is his favourite, the wrong answer confirms the worst, and the treatment is applied from under the couch cushion. McGinley’s shaking recovery and immediate follow-up question about the woman in the kitchen is the best laugh in the half-hour.

The retreat itself is a softer target and the episode knows it, running through the feeding exercises and the singalongs at a brisk clip rather than lingering. Edward Hibbert’s Dr. Richelieu is pitched as an unflappable professional, which was recognisable at the time from Hibbert’s recurring work as the critic Gil Chesterton on Frasier. What the compound is really there to do is strand Al in a group therapy setting, where his only available move is endurance.

Ephraim’s departure is the episode’s one genuine structural change. Tim Conway had played the character as a defeated man since season three, and giving him a world tour with somebody else’s wife is both a reward and a problem: it means Peg’s mother stays put, and Al’s entire motivation for the half-hour has been for nothing. The series rarely bothered to resolve a premise this cleanly against its protagonist.

Famous Quotes

• Al: “Sorry, Marcy, I mistook you for a 70-year-old hillbilly. Well, I’m sure that you get that all the time.” Opening the door expecting Ephraim.
• Al: “Jefferson? You in there, buddy? What happened to you? You used to be a man.” / Jefferson: “I am a man.” / Al: “Then who’s your favorite stooge?” / Jefferson: “The 3 Stooges are not funny.”
• Al: “It’s a lot worse than I thought. Luckily, I have something for such an emergency.” Producing the magazines from beneath the couch cushion.
• Jefferson: “It’s all coming back to me. Moe! Moe, is my favorite Stooge!” / Al: “Those bastards, they almost got you.” / Jefferson: “Hey, who’s the broad in the kitchen?” / Al: “Well, that’s your wife.”
• Marcy: “Let’s go, Jefferson. It’s almost time for my nooner.” / Al: “Take two of these…” Handing over a couple of magazines as a prescription.

Notes

• Carlos joins Genghis and Vinnie Verducci as one of only three boyfriends the series brought back for Kelly more than once; he returns in “Al Goes to the Dogs.”
• Kelly saying “Adidas” instead of “Adios” repeats a joke from season five’s “One Down, Two to Go.”
• One of the Big ‘Uns issues Al hands Jefferson looks to be the Christmas special seen in season seven’s “Un-Alful Entry.”
• Edward Hibbert was then familiar as Gil Chesterton on Frasier. David Sederholm, who plays Phillip, had appeared in season six’s “Al Bundy, Shoe Dick” as Bruce Van Pelt; both men also turned up in the same Frasier episode without sharing a scene.
• Weenie Tots are among the food items in the couples’ feeding exercise, a callback for anyone who remembers season five.
• The couples sing “Kumbaya” twice.
• Goof: Al visibly laughs and glances at the crew twice after the “creamy nougat center” line, and the audio on “…with these clowns” appears to be dubbed.