Season 8 Episode 1: A Tisket, a Tasket, Can Peg Make a Basket?

Season 8 opens at an NBA All-Star game. Al and Peg have tickets, and when they get to their seats Peg talks Al into swapping, which turns out to be the most consequential decision either of them makes all year: her seat number is drawn for a halftime free throw contest worth ten thousand dollars. So Peggy Bundy, in a leopard print top, walks out onto an NBA floor to shoot one free throw for more money than her husband earns in a year, while Al watches from the stands having given away the chance himself. Kelly is at the same game, having attached herself to the All-Star cheerleading squad and also, dressed as Tina Turner, having been allowed near a microphone for the national anthem. Her attempt to pick up Vlade Divac during the dance routine produces the best exchange of the episode, and his two deadpan replies are better than anything the script could have given a professional actor. Clyde Drexler and Xavier McDaniel also appear as themselves. Whether Peg makes the shot is the question the episode is built on, and Al’s response to the outcome is the most concise statement of his worldview in the entire series: he wanted it, he needed it, he deserved it, so how else could it have turned out. It is a strong opener, and it establishes the shape of season 8 immediately: the Bundys get within arm’s reach of money and it goes nowhere.Peggy Bundy standing alone on an NBA floor is also one of the better images the show ever produced.

Episode Facts

• Original air date: September 5, 1993
• Season and episode: Season 8, Episode 1
• Overall episode number: 157
• Written by: Kim Weiskopf
• Directed by: Tony Singletary
• Production note: New opening credits clips debut with this episode for every regular except Christina Applegate.
• Production note: Marcy has shorter brown hair for the first half of season 8.
• Title note: From the nursery rhyme “A-Tisket, A-Tasket.”

Guest Cast

• Vlade Divac as himself
• Clyde Drexler as himself
• Xavier McDaniel as himself
• Roy Fegan as the team official
• Ray Clay as the P.A. announcer
• Gerald Emerick as the man behind Al
• Kari Cuartero, Marianne Herme, Tracy Lindley, Alexis Martinez, Shannon Roy and Kathalene Taylor as the All Star Girls

One Free Throw for Ten Thousand Dollars

The new season 8 credits are worth a look on their own. Al is on the couch with the remote and visibly less hair. Peg comes down the stairs in the leopard top she wears at the game. Marcy, now brunette and short-haired, stands at the Bundy door in a “Feminism Lives” shirt holding a collection jar and has it shut in her face. Bud sits at the kitchen table filling in his beard with a black marker. Jefferson shuffles a deck of cards and looks directly into the lens.

Kelly’s attempt on Vlade Divac is the highlight. She offers to make him very happy, he asks whether she can set his VCR, and when she gives him her phone number he notes that it contains only six digits. Divac, then with the Lakers and two years into his NBA career, delivers both lines completely flat and they land better for it.

Ray Clay, credited as the P.A. announcer, was the actual public address announcer for the Chicago Bulls, the man responsible for the Bulls’ starting lineup introductions during the Jordan era. Casting him is the kind of detail this show did quietly.

Al’s closing exchange with Peg is a perfect cold open to a season. He absolves her, explains that the outcome was inevitable given how much he wanted it, and then agrees without hesitation when she suggests the fault is therefore his. His dating of when that began is the punchline.

Famous Quotes

• Bud, to his departing mother: “But, Mom, you’ll miss Dad’s latest episode of ‘A fat woman came into the shoe store today.’” Peg: “Actually, I already know how it ends. He doesn’t get the sale or a life.”
• Kelly, to Vlade Divac: “My name’s Kelly. I can make you very happy.” Divac: “You can show me how to set my VCR?” Kelly: “If necessary.”
• Divac, examining the number she has written on her leg: “There’s only six numbers.” Kelly: “Well come on, I’m not easy.”
• Al, consoling his wife: “It’s the only way it could be. I wanted it, I needed it, I deserved it, how else could it have turned out?” Peg: “Then it’s your fault.” Al: “From the minute I said ‘I do.’”

Notes

• Kelly, dressed as Tina Turner, performs the national anthem at the game, badly.
• “Whoot, There It Is” by 95 South scores Kelly’s attempt to keep up with the cheerleaders.
• Bud is collecting for a charity called Hands Across the Suburbs, a send-up of Hands Across America.
• Marcy and Jefferson’s big night out is a Captain and Tennille concert.
• Al admits to having eaten the charity chocolate mints himself.